Insomnia

When you told me I should rest I told you that everything is beautiful when everyone else is asleep.

And you bought it. 

I wanted you to tell me that it's always better when someone else is with you.

That when everyone else is asleep i should be too.

That I had you to get me through it. And that i wasn't alone.

I wanted to tell you how much I yearned to sleep. How much the night scares me.

 

The morning light makes me feel better but when everyone is asleep i am alone.. trying to get my tired eyes to close but failing miserably.

But I couldn't. I could never tell you.

 I felt weak, abnormal, but I'm an insomniac and this is "normal" for me. I watched you slip into slumber while i stay awake, barely breathing, trying my best to calm my mind.

Next time you ask me if I'm okay.. I'll not run away. Not from you. Not from myself. 

I'll tell you how the night is long and the mornings are tired. I'll tell you how seeing you sleep makes me jealous. I'll tell you that i need to sleep too.

Next time.. I'll tell you......

_________________

Oajaswini S